First day of School

I refer to daycare as school.  It sounds better and makes me feel less guilty about leaving Liam at daycare all day long.  Liam started SCHOOL on October 28th.  I had to go back to work. I was supposed to go back when Liam was 8 weeks old.  Then I pushed it back to 9 weeks because Greg had a business trip.  I decided I couldn't do that either. I went into work and pushed it back even further.  When I went into work and asked for more time from my boss he said, "When do you think you will be ready to come back?" I said, "When Liam is 5 and he can come to school with me!" The truth is I will never be ready to leave Liam, but it had to happen eventually.  There were so many nights I wanted to call my work and say sorry I can't come back. I would wake up at night and plan my speech in my head and I honestly felt good about it.  Then I would wake up the next morning and think "I can do this!  I don't need to quit."

Honestly, I've never wanted to be a stay at home mom.  From the moment I got pregnant I never imagined myself staying home. I have always thought I would have children and work.  That's what my mom did.  So the decision seemed easy for me. Once you have a baby that all goes out the window. Of course I would LOVE to stay home.  Greg is completely all about it, which actually didn't help my decision at all. In my mind I know I need to try working. I have to give it a shot and see how it goes. It is also a plus to really LOVE your job. I don't get paid anything, but I love the people I work with. 

So when Liam was 11 and a half weeks old, off to work I went. And off to school he went.

 

 

Greg and I decided the first day of school we would do drop off together. We packed his bag with everything he would need.  We were ready. As soon as I pulled into the parking lot the tears started. His teacher eventually took him from me as I stood in his room crying.  She assured me he would have a great day.  I looked up at Liam and he had a huge smile on his face.  It was like he was saying, "It's okay mommy, go to work! I'll be fine." Everyday gets better and no more tears have been shed. It probably also helps that Greg does drop off and I do pick up.